I need a big kick in the butt!!

Okay I am really just using this blog as a journal but I almost wish there was someone reading it and that they would give me a swift kick in the butt. I woke up this morning to work out but so did my five month old baby. So, I had to postpone my workout to nap time. Which is fine I still got 40 minutes on my bike and some core workout in. However, I keep reading these other people's blogs and they talk about all the exercise they are doing and I wonder how are they doing this. Like one girl ran 16 miles today. I would love to have time to do that and also love to have the determination to do that. Then I read another blog about a lady and she posted her workouts for the week and they put my work outs to shame. How do they do it what gives them this motivation to work so hard? I want to be like them. Infact I dream about working out harding than I am but then when it comes down to it I never do. WHy do I do this to myself? Am I afraid of something? What is weird is that deep down I know that I could work hard and be better. In fact I have always had a dream in my head about the type of body I want and the type of exercise I want to do but I continue to defeat myself. What truly is stopping me from becoming who I really want to be? Then when it comes to my eating habits I am just horrible. How do people have the self control not to eat food that you shouldn't? As soon as I set limits for myself with this aspect of food then that is all I can think about.
These are some pretty personal thoughts that I have about myself that I really don't share with anyone. So, if there is some crazy person reading this I hope you will be nice when you give me my butt kicking.
The crazy thing is, is that I constantly give my self kicks in the butt. I think that the problem here is that sometimes we are harder on ourselves than we would be anybody else. I need to cut myself some slack and realize that other people have things that they deal with. I need to learn to be nicer to myself and not give up. I need to resolve to just try again the next day until I get it right. I need to just work harder at becoming who I really want to be and realize that there are going to be ups and downs along that path but that if I just keep trying I can get there. So, tomorrow is new day and I resolve to better tomorrow than I did today. Right now I am going to go make a plan for my tomorrow and see if I can stick with it. I will let you know how it goes.