Healing

It's probably about time you heard from me (Josie). They say it's healing to write.  So I write.  Although the words don't come easy. We (my sister and I) write to make sense of our life and release the hurt inside.  I recently read a book called, Sunset, and the author had the same feelings I did.

He said, "How do you say good-bye to part of yourself? I haven't learned this yet.  The finality is too overwhelming.  Could it be that this is an unconscious witness that we don't need to say it because there is no such finality?"  I believe so.  It's hard for me to say good-bye.  I once heard that grieving allows us to heal, remembering with love.  I think that's our purpose in Shifting to a higher gear.  Remembering our dad with love, and letting ourselves heal at the same time by pushing ourselves to become better.

Last November my dad, his wife, and I signed up to run the Ogden Half marathon.  My step mom and I have been running together this winter and getting ready for the race.  The race is only three weeks away.  There was no question in my mind that I should still run the race.   There is no question in my mind that my dad will be with me every step of that race too.

So I will run the Ogden 1/2 in his honor.  It's more than just a race to me.  It's another way for me to remember my dad with love.

I will run with more purpose now.  I will push myself to be better, to shift to the higher gear and become a better person because of this experience.  I recently read a quote on another blog of a classmate whose son is battling cancer it reads: "Things don't go wrong and break your heart so you can become bitter and give up.  They happen to break you down and build you up so you can be all that you were intended to be." Samuel Johnson

Keep Shifting...
Josie